A Shopping Mall Summer
by SpammishRice
Summary: The summer after her first year in college finds the sheltered yet privileged Hyuuga heiress at her very first job -- at Hot Dog On A Stick. Featuring Hinata, Shikamaru, Sasuke, Ino, Sakura, Kiba, Shino, and Chouji, among others. No pairings yet.
1. When Life Gives You Lemons

Monday mornings were always depressing for Kiba. It had a dreary "back-to-work" vibe even when he worked on Sundays. Normally, he worked Sundays, skipped that dreaded Monday, and happily worked again on Tuesday. It was a silly psychological thing, he knew, but that's how it worked for him. Yet here he was, slowly steering his car towards the downward ramp that led to the shopping mall's underground employee parking. The summer morning was sucked away as he entered the glaring, yellow-orange lit vehicular dungeon.

He fully blamed his bratty high schooler coworker for this, the nerve of that punk to call in sick the first day of summer break! Kiba could go on for days how it wasn't fair, that this kid (he couldn't be bothered to remember his name) obviously WASN'T sick on a bright and sunny late-May morning, and that he was an ingrate for not appreciating that he had a job when college students like Kiba, who actually NEEDED to work for every little bit of cash, would gladly scoop animal shit to pay for school.

Being one of the first mall employees to arrive at this hour, he pulled his open-top Jeep into a space next to a familiar VW Beetle.

"Akamaru, we're here," he announced towards the general direction of his Jeep's rear. A canine whimper of protest was the response.

"Suck it up, we gotta work. Let's go."

At that, a large white dog leapt out of the back of the car and followed his master into the dingy elevator that time, or more likely the janitorial staff, forgot. Employee elevators were never as nice as the mall patron elevators.

One buzzy, short-circuity "ding" later, and Kiba and Akamaru trudged their way to the pet store. The doors were already unlocked, not that he would have expected otherwise when Shino was opening with him. He walked in to find his friend and coworker sitting on a stool behind the counter, reading _The Voice of the Infinite in the Small: Revisioning the Insect-Human Connection_. Again.

"Morning, Shino," Kiba greeted as he walked into the back room to clock in.

"Good morning," Shino responded without looking up from his book.

Judging by Shino's non-work related activity, all the store-opening duties were done, an hour before the store actually opened. Kiba went behind the counter and found that Shino had even pulled out and filled Akamaru's food and water bowls.

He gave Shino a playful slap on the back. "Thanks for opening. But you could've waited for me too."

Shino put a bookmark in his book, perfectly parallel with the book's spine Kiba noticed, and pushed his dark glasses further up the bridge of his nose. "I decided to come early when the boss called to tell me our younger coworker would not be coming in."

"Pfft, and I volunteered to cover that kid's shift so you wouldn't have had to come in early."

"Thank you, but I was up already," Shino responded, then added, "Breakfast?"

Kiba ruffled his hair, shoved his hands in his pockets, and shouldered open the shop's door. "Yeah, let's go. We'll be back Akamaru."

As the two young men approached the escalator headed down to the food court, a tiny girl ran up and cut in front of them. They wouldn't have even noticed had she not turned around and squeaked out an apology before walking down the already moving steps. Kiba took in her outfit: a gigantic grey hoodie with the hood covering everything but her nose and mouth, white, neatly folded socks, and pristine white sneakers. He thought she'd forgotten to put on pants until she stepped off the escalator and revealed a glimpse of the hem of her royal blue cotton shorts.

_Oh, the poor girl._

"Hot Dog On A Stick," Shino confirmed.

"Yeah. She must be new," Kiba said, watching the girl remove her sweatshirt behind the counter, revealing the colorblocked sleeveless shirt all Hot Dog girls wore. She rolled her waist-length midnight blue hair into her uniform cap and bobby pinned it all in place. Then a large young man stepped out from the back in the slightly less humiliating male version of the Hot Dog On A Stick uniform to greet the newly arrived girl. Kiba and Shino recognized the assistant manager, Chouji, and waved hello before heading in the other direction to the coffee stand.

"Good morning, gentlemen! How may I be of service to you?" was the grandiose welcome issued by the coffee stand's manager, Gai. Many wondered if he snorted ground espresso beans directly, but Gai insisted he stuck strictly to decaf.

"Two grande drips, black please," Kiba ordered, then paid for both drinks. Shino wordlessly pointed to a blueberry scone and a banana nut muffin in the pastry display, which a second employee pulled out, bagged, and rung up for Shino. Kiba raised an inquiring brow.

"Hey Gai, where's Lee?"

"Oh, Lee!" the coffee manager exclaimed. "He has advanced and moved beyond food service! As his mentor I am exceedingly pleased that he has surpassed me!"

"Right. Where's he surpassed off to?"

Gai blinked away his tears of pride before answering, "Sports Authority, second level!"

"Nice. Have a good day, Gai," Kiba said before heading back to the pet store with Shino.

"Have a successful and productive day, young sirs!" Gai called back at them.

----

"Looking forward to your first day, Hinata?" Chouji cheerfully asked.

The girl had folded up her gray hoodie and was looking for a place to keep it until her shift was over. "Oh, yes, of course!" she replied a little too enthusiastically, then much more quietly, "I-I didn't get a chance to thank you for putting in a good word for me with your manager. I really appreciate it."

The man waved it off, "Don't worry about it. Jiraiya was looking to hire more help anyway, and I just happened to know someone who could do a good job." Chouji was too polite to give the full reason why he thought Hinata would do spectacularly at Hot Dog On A Stick. She was a bit sheltered and would probably fall in a dead faint if she knew. He inwardly cringed at the fact that he was about to train her in the one job duty that he was sure would make her one of the most popular Hot Dog girls they've had to date.

"So, have you ever made lemonade before?"

Hinata, ever studious, shook her head and waited eagerly for instruction.

"Okay, normally, you would mix lemon juice, sugar, and water in a pitcher. However--" Chouji pulled out a large bucket and a juicer so large it had handle bars, "--because we're serving large numbers, we have to make the lemonade in large batches. And it's always fresh squeezed."

Chouji dumped cut lemons into the bucket, placed the juicer base, essentially a big disc with holes, on top, then poured water and simple syrup in as well.

"Okay, this is the hard part. It's also a trademark of Hot Dog On A Stick." He gripped the handle bars and pushed down hard . "We squeeze the lemons like so, and while the seeds and rinds stay pressed to the bottom, the juice comes up and mixes with the syrup and water." He continued to press down on the lemons, then stepped aside to let Hinata try. This was the defining moment.

The petite girl took hold of the bars and did her best to press down on the lemons, but it was a weak attempt. After a couple more tries, she looked put out and looked at Chouji as if asking for tips.

He obliged, "Uh, try jumping up then putting all your weight on it."

"I-is that okay?" Hinata looked unsure.

"It happens all the time, especially with the girl employees. I mean, I'm a big guy, and even I break a sweat doing this."

Hinata nodded, albeit still unsure. "O-okay."

She steadied herself, firmed her grip on the juicer's handle bars, then with a squeaky grunt, jumped onto the juicer, pressing her full weight down onto the lemons. Then she did it again, more assuredly. Then again, and again, and she looked up and grinned at Chouji.

"Heh, you're doing great, Hinata, keep it up!" he said with a thumbs up. "I have to go in the back and prepare the batter for the dogs." He quickly ducked into the back room, but not before noticing nearly every male food court employee halting their opening duties to watch the cute though very top-heavy girl bounce up and down with her little grunts and whimpers.

Chouji sighed. The lines were going to be very long this summer at Hot Dog On A Stick.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks for reading!

Starting up another story, yet another AU. This one will be much shorter than Subjective Humanity. I'll be writing them simultaneously, so we'll see how this works out. The next SH chapter will be out soon, I promise!


	2. Consummate Professionals

"I think they should be _higher_."

It was a slow Monday morning at Victoria's Secret, and Ino was taking full advantage of the lack of customers a couple of hours into the day by trying on the merchandise, which was currently a push-up bra under her low-cut black top. Her manager, Tsunade, tutted her disapproval while stringing up skimpy undergarments onto plush display hangers.

"One only has so much to push up, sweetheart."

Ino frowned at her augmented cleavage. "I'd get more sales if they looked like yours."

"You'd need a bit more than a push-up bra," Tsunade replied tonelessly, then playfully added, "Try the couch cushions in the break room."

The younger blonde was about to sling a nasty retort involving sagginess when a pink-haired girl skipped into the store, bubbling with excitement.

"Oh my God, Ino! You'll never guess–," she stopped short at the sight of Ino, "Jesus, what happened to your chest? You look like a head sitting on top of an ass."

Ino flipped her long ponytail over her shoulder to properly display her assets and shot back cheerfully, "Oh, I'm sorry, Sakura, did no one tell you? They're called breasts. Most girls grow them when they hit puberty."

Sakura, quite used to her friend's quips about her smaller chest, waved her off and continued with her original intention with renewed fervor. "Anyway, I was saying, guess who works here at the mall now?"

Mildly interested, Ino looked Sakura up and down. "Hmm, your denim miniskirt and legwarmers tell me...New Kids On The Block?"

Even insulting Sakura's employee-required Abercrombie & Fitch threads didn't bring her down, because the girl just bounced and squealed, "No, just guess!"

Ino eyed her best friend warily. Only one person could leave Sakura this effervescently chipper. The platinum blonde's eyes suddenly went as round as saucers.

"..No."

"Yes."

"No!"

"Yes! Yes, yes, YES!"

"When?"

"He starts around lunch time!"

In a mad panic, Ino started grabbing random bras off their racks, "Shit! I need to find a better bra!"

----

Hinata was shocked by the number of people who ate at Hot Dog On A Stick. It was barely 12:30, on a Monday no less, and she and Chouji already had to make a new batch of corndogs to meet the public's demand. Though, she thought to herself, "public" wasn't the right word to describe the customers. She noticed most of them were male mall employees. Well, she _did_ work at a kitschy corndog stand. Maybe it was some sort of inside joke with the guys, like police officers eating donuts fully knowing they were perpetuating the stereotype, but continuing to do so ironically.

Or, they just really liked corndogs.

"Welcome to Hot Dog On A Stick, may I..." Hinata stopped when she recognized the customer from not more than fifteen minutes ago. "I'm sorry, did you forget something?"

The kid grinned goofily. "I, uh, forgot to buy lemonade."

Hinata smiled at the poor thirsty boy, "Oh, of course! I'll get that for you right away!" She turned to the lemonade dispenser with a cup, but the boy interrupted her.

"I need um, five lemonades...no, make it six," he said while staring at the lemonade swirling in the big clear tank, like he was estimating how much was left.

The blue-haired employee looked up at the lemonade tank – there was no WAY she could get six servings out of there! She began to fret.

"I'm s-sorry, I don't think there's enough lemonade left. If you wouldn't mind waiting, I can make more?"

The boy nodded eagerly, "By all means, take your time!"

Cheered by such an understanding customer, Hinata peeked her head into the back room and found Chouji shoving sticks into weiners in preparation for batter-dipping.

"What's up, Hinata?"

"Er, a customer requested six lemonades but we don't have that much left, and there's still a long line..." she meekly explained.

Chouji was not new to the game. He sighed and hefted a large bucket of cut lemons while walking out to the front with her. "Don't worry about it. I'll cover the register and orders, you can go ahead and make more lemonade."

After Chouji set the bucket down behind the counter, Hinata went right into making more lemonade, bouncing and pressing and squeaking and grunting. Chouji turned to look back at his line of waiting customers and found they were mesmerized by the new Hot Dog girl. All except his next customer who was shaking his head in both amusement and exasperation. The young man ran a hand over his spiky ponytail and greeted his friend.

"What's a non-horny guy gotta do to get a corndog around here?"

The assistant manager smirked, "Hey Shikamaru. Corndog and fries, as usual? Or did you want to wait for lemonade too?"

"I'm good, thanks," he answered as Chouji handed him his food and didn't bother ringing it up. Shikamaru turned to watch the petite girl smash lemons and commented, "She has no idea what she's doing."

Chouji turned back to observe his hard-working coworker. "No, she's doing fine. She's actually doing really well for her first job, very focused."

The other boy gave a sideways smile, "I meant in reference to the customers. I don't doubt her lemonade-making. She has no idea what she's doing to _them_."

Chouji laughed loudly, "Stay a bit, I'll be on my break shortly." He turned back to the line of people, "Next in line!"

No response from the next customer, so he tried again. "Next in line!"

Shikamaru moved off to the side, towards the end of the counter where the new girl was working on the juice-squeezing. She was completely absorbed in pressing the hell out of those lemons, but looked up when she sensed Shikamaru standing there.

"I-I'm sorry, were you waiting for a lemonade?"

He shook his head, "Nah, just waiting for my friend to break for lunch."

"Oh." She smiled graciously and went back to the lemon smashing, and Shikamaru turned his attention to the waiting line of customers. The obvious next customer was oblivious to Chouji's calling, but he noticed four people down the line was a very irritated-looking classmate of his. He wouldn't call him a friend, and he did know that the guy was generally antisocial, but strangely enough didn't mind Shikamaru's small talk in class, so he felt he was allowed to greet him.

"Oi, Sasuke."

Tall, handsome, completely dressed in black, and scowl blacker than his outfit, Sasuke's eyes flicked over to Shikamaru.

"You work here now?" the pony-tailed boy asked.

Sasuke nodded, then looked at his watch and added, "I start in ten minutes."

Shikamaru motioned his head toward the counter. "Just cut in front of them."

The other boy quirked a confused eyebrow.

Well acquainted with his minimalist communication methods, Shikamaru added, "They're too busy watching the new girl."

Sasuke still looked confused, but listened to Shikamaru regardless and cut in front of the other patrons to place his order of a corndog and lemonade with Chouji, who gave him the corndog and an empty drink cup and directed him to Hinata. He walked over to Shikamaru to wait for his drink.

"Will this take much longer?" he asked, not so much annoyed as he was impatient.

"She's almost done," Shikamaru replied, then asked, "Why are you eating here anyway? There are plenty of other places in the food court."

The black-clad boy shook his head disgustedly, "Look at the girls. And don't tell me you'd be willing to buy anything from them."

Shikamaru looked around at the other food stands, and sure enough, the girls working them kept looking over at Sasuke, whispering to each other, giggling, or doing other nonsensical fangirly things one shouldn't do when cooking or serving food. He turned back and saw Sasuke's uneasy posture and laughed outright.

"Don't worry, it looks like this new girl here is more taken with those lemons."

Sasuke, who was so used to avoiding any female's line of sight almost instinctively, looked upon the Hot Dog girl for the first time. Indeed, she didn't even notice the two young men were standing no more than ten feet away and talking about her. It was humorously unnerving.

By now, Hinata had finished juicing the lemons and was standing on a stool about to pour the bucket's liquid contents into the tank dispenser when she caught sight of Sasuke's empty cup in his hand.

"Oh! Were you waiting for your drink?"

Shikamaru tried very hard to keep his laughter in as Sasuke, almost instantly as a reaction to a female voice addressing him, immediately tightened and straightened his stance and schooled his face into a haughty scowl but still nodded in answer to the young woman's question.

Hinata, completely unaffected, smiled, stepped off the stool, took Sasuke's cup, and poured the lemonade directly out of the bucket, then handed the full cup back to Sasuke.

"I'm very sorry you had to wait. The cup tops and straws are at the condiment corner just behind me against the wall," she said, while pointing to the area mentioned. Then she went right back up the stool to pour the rest of the lemonade into the clear tank. Sasuke, looking every bit dumbfounded and failing miserably at hiding it, stood there for another minute before turning around and heading up the escalator to start his work shift. He didn't even bother with the tops and straws.

A few minutes later, Chouji stepped out from behind the counter with a tray laden with corndogs, fries, and a large drink and found Shikamaru sporting a silly smirk.

"What's got you in a good mood?"

Shikamaru chuckled, "Remind me to ask you later about how you filled your open position."

"Why?" Chouji frowned.

"Your new girl just totally mindfucked Sasuke."

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks for reading! And let me know what you think! This story is, for the most part, unplanned and type-as-I-go, so input would be nice. :)

If any of you are unfamiliar with Hot Dog On A Stick, I highly (HIGHLY!) recommend typing in "Hot Dog On A Stick" in Google Images. Believe me, it's hilarious. XD


	3. Unquestionable Work Ethic

"Where's he going where's he going where's he going?" Ino muttered under her breath as she watched Uchiha Sasuke come up the escalator from the food court. She and Sakura had stationed themselves in front of the pet store to keep a clear line of sight on the raven-haired boy without seeming too obvious.

Sakura's eyes surreptitiously followed him. He stopped for a moment to look at the Directory display, killing time as he ate a corndog. "He's dressed all in black." She suddenly gasped, "Oh my God, you don't think maybe...he works at the Cheesecake Factory?"

The Cheesecake Factory was at the very top of the mall, built right on top of the roof as an addition. Though it could have been considered food service, its hierarchal position was above even that of the commission-based high end department store it sat on, never mind the lowly food court. With the wait staff entirely in white and the hosts entirely in black, Cheesecake Factory employees represented the pure and untainted elitism their employer established in the mall.

Ino pouted her lips in thought, "I don't think so. Cheesecake Factory straight off the bat is unheard of without getting your feet wet on a lower level." She mentally went over the possible stores Sasuke could be heading to in his attire as Sakura counted off on her fingers the possible destination.

"L'Occitane?"

"Hmm, no, he's way too hetero to sell French bath and beauty products."

"Banana Republic?"

"Not with his shirt untucked like that."

"That rules out Express Men, the Apple store, Aldo shoes, and the cell phone kiosk," Sakura counted off.

"Maybe Godiva?" Ino suggested.

"Perhaps...the apron would cover the untucked shirt. But he seems the type who'd rather tuck in his shirt than wear an apron."

The blonde nodded, agreeing with Sakura's reasoning. "Unlikely as it is, Cheesecake Factory sounds like the best option."

"But I'm pretty sure they have to tuck in their shirts too..."

An annoyed voice interrupted their investigative discussion.

"Are you done loitering here yet? If you keep standing there doing nothing in front of the kitten window, they'll develop a complex," Kiba snapped at the girls.

The two whipped around. "Oh, shut up. It's not loitering if we work here," Ino replied.

"You're not working. You're stalking," the Inuzuka deadpanned.

The pink-haired girl huffed, hands on her hips. "We're _merely_ observing a new fellow mall employee out of curiosity."

Kiba stepped further out of the pet store to better scan the mall's ground floor, and immediately spotted the young women's object of observation. "Christ, you're trying to find out where Sasuke works, aren't you?"

"So? What of it?" Ino sniffed.

Judging by Sasuke's entirely black outfit, and the girls' obvious and long-standing worship of the guy, Kiba already knew what they were thinking. "He doesn't work at Cheesecake Factory," he smirked.

"How would _you_ know?" Sakura snapped, despite hers and Ino's initial doubt of the Uchiha's employment there just a few minutes ago.

"He's too much of a prick," the boy answered matter-of-factly while pulling his cell phone out of his pocket. The girls looked absolutely scandalized. Their attempts at telling off the messy-haired boy were shushed as he dialed a number and put the phone on speaker.

"_Hello?"_

"Hey, Naruto. It's Kiba."

"_Oh hey! What's up?"_

"I've got Ino and Sakura here, and they want to know if Sasuke works with you."

Sakura turned to Ino, "'_With_' him? Naruto's working at the Cheesecake Factory?" she asked in what was an attempt at a whisper.

"_Hi Sakura."_

"Er, hi Naruto," she sputtered before Ino leaned in to interrupt.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. So, Naruto? Does Sasuke work with you or not?"

The voice on the phone scoffed.

"_Ha! Nope! He's not employed up here, even though he could have worked here if he wanted."_

Ino's eyes lit up in awe. "He turned down an offer from Cheesecake Factory. That's so badass." Kiba just rolled his eyes.

"_Meh, nothing special. His brother's the assistant manager. He had an easy 'in'."_

The two girls looked at each other excitedly and exclaimed, "He has a BROTHER?"

Kiba, who was looking more and more irritated, said, "At least this brother has the courtesy to be an Uchiha jackass far away from everyone else." However, it was Naruto that cut through Ino and Sakura's excited giggles.

"_While he doesn't work up here, I DO happen to know where the bastard does work."_

"Where?!" Sakura practically yelled into Kiba's phone. The phone's owner made a show of wiping spit off of it.

Instead of answering her, Naruto asked, _"Kiba, what time is it?"_

Kiba looked at his watch, "It is exactly...12:59."

"_I'm assuming you can see Sasuke from where you are?"_

"Yeah, we see him," he replied. The girls immediately spun around to find Sasuke again, who had continued walking.

"_Okay,"_ Kiba could practically hear the Cheshire grin in Naruto's voice, _"His shift starts at one. You'll find out any second now..."_

At this point, the young women had taken to muttering to themselves.

"He just walked past Brookstone...."

"Pssh, like he'd ever work there. Perhaps Gap?"

"No, he's walked right by it. Oh, wait it might be Walden Books!"

"Nope, past that one too. Wait..."

"Is he turning?"

"Oh my God he's turning...!"

"Turning...into..."

"Hot Topic?!"

Behind Ino and Sakura, Kiba had fallen back into the pet store laughing, rolling on the floor in his mirth, while Naruto's maniacal laughter could be heard on the speaker phone.

------

"We work in Hot Topic, Karin. Who the hell are you trying to impress?" A boy with shaggy silver hair asked while watching his co-worker alternately muss up her bright red hair on one side of her head and comb it stick-straight on the other side in front of one of the store's mirrors.

"Shut your hole, Suigetsu," the girl in question responded.

Suigetsu did the opposite. "I mean, really, are you trying to impress our three target demographics at once? I assume the bright red is for punks, the flat side of your hair is for the goths, and the greasy bedhead side is for the emos? I'm sure they'll all appreciate your efforts to relate to them, but you look like an idiot."

Karin tossed Suigetsu a mean look, but continued to work on her erratic hair. Suigetsu, looking for some other way to get a response from the redhead, grabbed a clipboard from under the counter and flipped to the week's employee schedule. A devious grin formed on his face.

"I see we have a new guy coming in today," he asked innocently.

Karin continued to ignore him.

"And it looks like he starts in, oh," the boy looked at his studded Nightmare Before Christmas watch, "two minutes!"

Karin's movements became a little more frantic, adjusting and unbuttoning a few buttons on her shirt, straightening out aesthetically-placed giant safety pins on her plaid miniskirt.

"You know what helps a new person feel more at ease?" Suigetsu faux-mused, "Telling work-related stories. A really great one to start with would be that time you came to work in those gigantic raver boots you could barely walk in, and you ended up falling over and crashing into--"

Wild-eyed and jaw clenched, the girl spun on Suigetsu, "Shut up. Shut up. Shut UP!"

He dropped the ruse, but kept his grin. "Why is Uchiha Sasuke working here?"

Dropping her voice conspiratorially, eyes darting around behind black-framed glasses, "Because he was looking for a job that didn't ride on his brother's coattails."

"But why here?"

"I told him he didn't have to greet or smile at customers and he could wear whatever he wanted."

Suigetsu quirked a suspicious brow, "So, you didn't sleep with him to get him to work here?"

Karin flushed. "No, I wish. Now don't embarrass me!" she whispered hoarsely, cursing her co-worker's wicked grin. She didn't realize it was not meant for her.

"Hi Sasuke!" he said far too cheerily for a Hot Topic employee.

The Uchiha strode in, looking effortlessly cool with a bare corndog stick hanging purposelessly from his lips and a bright blue cup half-filled with lemonade dangling limply from his fingertips. He nodded almost imperceptibly in answer to the silver-haired teen without breaking stride, and went straight into the back room to clock in. Karin took the opportunity to snap out of her mesmerized stupor and undo one more button on her shirt. Suigetsu snickered.

"He looks like Edward Scissorhands."

"What?" the redheaded girl snapped.

"Pasty skin, stupid-looking hair, all dressed in black, and to top it all off, can't talk to people," the other teen explained. "Give him scissors for hands, and you've got a creepy, castle-dwelling mandroid who gets his kicks cutting hedges and old ladies' hair."

Karin shrugged the insults off, "Whatever, Johnny Depp is hot."

"Pfft, not as Edward Scissorhands."

Before the girl could retort, Sasuke came back out, sipping at his lemonade. She promptly approached him, eager to help the new employee.

"Hi, I'm Karin!"

The dark-haired boy sipped his drink. "....hi."

Seemingly encouraged by his reply, she went on, "So, I know you're new, but I was wondering if you needed help, you know, with training or anything like that..."

Sasuke's face remained expressionless. "Juugo trained me yesterday."

Suigetsu, laughing heartily, swung an arm over Sasuke's shoulder. "Never mind her, she just wants you to look at her boobs." He pulled the other boy away from the girl, who was opening and closing her mouth but unsuccessful in producing any sort of sound.

"I've been here longer, and I know from experience that every employee has their own way of keeping their sales up. Juugo already explained the sales goals?"

"Yes," the Uchiha answered.

"Okay. Take me for example. I talk a lot. I also happen to be quite charming," Suigetsu demonstrated with a dashing smile. "I get most of my sales by talking people up, praising, 'You would look SO hardcore and rebellious wearing this artistically torn tank top with that retro Lost Boys hoodie,' you know how it goes."

Sasuke merely blinked at him.

"And I can tell you're not much of a talker. So you need to figure out your most effective way to sell." Suigetsu pulled the other boy along and positioned him ten feet from the store's door, standing in between a rack of gothic fairy notebooks and Punk Rock Hello Kitty shirts.

"Luckily for you, I think I've got your selling style pinned. Do exactly what you're doing now, standing at this spot."

"At the front of the store?"

"Don't worry, you don't even have to talk to the people who come in. Just ring them up when they come up to you wanting to buy stuff."

Sasuke looked a bit doubtful. "That's all?"

Suigetsu nodded sagely, "That's all. It's just an experiment. We'll see how it goes." And he headed for the rear of the store, leaving the other boy at the front, still sipping his lemonade. As Suigetsu walked up to Karin, she narrowed her eyes suspiciously at him.

"'Just stand there'? What kind of advice is that? Are you trying to steal his sales?" she accused.

The young man gasped in feigned shock, "Excuse me? How dare you suggest such a diabolical idea!"

"Suigetsu...."

He smirked, "Relax. I was being serious. I think I figured out the best way for him to sell. And if I'm correct, we may make more money than usual. See?"

Karin looked to the front of the store, where two girls walked by, did a double-take at an indifferent Sasuke, and cautiously walked in, obvious with their candy-colored polo shirts that it was their first time in Hot Topic. They circled the store, seemingly looking at the items on display, but eyes frequently turning to the dark-haired boy still standing in the middle of the store, completely ignoring them. A few more girls walked in, doing the exact same thing, picking up little knick knacks as if to shop, but not really looking at whatever they were holding. When the number of girls circling the store reached eleven, Suigetsu grinned in amusement.

"Look at 'em! Like flies to shit!"

Karin kicked the boy in the shin with her platform Mary Janes.

----------

The late afternoon was warm and blissful. The sky was a soft, deep blue, occasionally succumbing to large puffy clouds rolling past. He could smell the fresh-cut grass beneath him and hear the whisper-light rustling of the tree leaves above him. It didn't get much better than this.

Then, from a distance, he could hear someone calling for attention.

"Excuse me?"

He closed his eyes. They'll go away soon enough.

"Excuse me?" Closer this time. Would they not go away?

"E-excuse me?" Now they had taken to nudging him. Damn it all, no point in napping now...

Shikamaru opened bleary eyes and rubbed them to clear his vision. He was back in the God-forsaken gift store. Or, more accurately, mall management-forsaken. When he could finally register that he was not, in fact, napping under his favorite tree, he realized a girl had woken him up, and was warily eyeing him as if expecting him to yell at her for the disturbance. When he realized she wasn't going to say anything until she was sure he was willing to help her, he spoke.

"Can I...help you?"

Huge lavender eyes that were wide with nervousness finally blinked, and the girl smiled her relief.

"Yes, um. I wanted to make a purchase..." she replied. She very gently placed an antique katana and display stand on the counter.

Shikamaru looked at the item in question. First, he didn't realize his little store sold antique katanas. Then again, like every other person in the mall, he didn't pay much attention to the place. Which, he considered, might not be a good thing since he actually worked there. Second, this was an _antique katana_ the girl had picked out. At the very least, it would be a four-figure price tag. Never mind this teenaged girl – _no one_ blows money like that in an eclectic hold-in-the-wall gift store. He kept his thoughts to himself as he looked for the price tag to ring up the sword.

"That'll be, $7,052.50," he informed her almost reluctantly. He was indifferent to most anything in the world, but even _he_ would feel bad if the girl didn't realize how expensive her choice in gifting was.

Instead, she handed him a credit card and asked, "Would it be possible to have it gift-wrapped?"

Relieved that she didn't object to the price, but somewhat appalled that it was no big deal to her, Shikamaru could only let out a semi-flustered, "Uh, yeah."

She grinned at him like it was the best thing ever, and he proceeded to dig out an oblong box and tissue paper. To narrow down his wrapping paper choices, he asked her, "Is this for a certain occasion?"

"Oh, for my cousin's birthday," she answered.

"Male or female?" he asked, though he was pretty sure the girl wouldn't buy an ancient sword for another girl.

"Male."

Shikamaru pulled out some neutral-colored wrapping paper and ribbon and got to work. After half a minute, the customer broke the silence.

"I-I didn't realize you worked at the mall as well."

Taken aback, he looked up at her. Was she implying that she worked here too? He took in her outfit: a cream-colored, intricately embroidered sundress and a light angora cardigan, and slightly heeled sandals. A simple enough outfit, but it was obvious that any single item she was wearing cost more than his weekly paycheck. Perhaps she was from the upstairs department store, even a personal shopper that the hoity-toity folks hired to help them, well, shop.

She correctly read Shikamaru's scrutiny for not recognizing her, so she helped him out.

"You bought a corndog...and waited for Chouji. I probably look different...I changed out of my uniform since my shift ended..." she began to babble.

If Shikamaru were the fumbling type, he would have dropped that sword point-down right on his foot. Luckily, he was not that type, but he still blustered, "Hot Dog On A Stick?!"

"Yes! You remember!"

He shook his head incredulously, "Yeah...I mean, I remember what happened down there, but I didn't realize it was you..."

The girl giggled, "I suppose I look different not wearing that funny little hat."

_To say the least_, Shikamaru thought to himself. Buying seven-thousand-dollar swords and wearing expensive designer duds, and she worked at Hot Dog On A Stick, of all places. He just couldn't wrap his absurdly intelligent mind around the very idea of it. He continued wrapping the girl's present.

She had begun looking around the store from where she stood, and Shikamaru could trace exactly what she was observing. First, the stone bird bath next to his counter, stone cherubs sitting on the rim. Then her eyes moved above him, where a buffalo head was mounted. To the right of that, an antique Winchester rifle, that he sometimes wondered was the one that shot the buffalo. Down below, leaning against the wall was a stack of black velvet paintings, the one visible of a almost cartoonishly angry tiger in the jungle. The shelves behind the girl had random little trinkets: novelty bottle openers, permanently formed miniature sand castles, tooth pick dispensers, a one-sixth scale purple banjo. Finally, her eyes landed on a sign tacked to the side of the counter, "Keys Made Here."

"Wow, this place has just about everything," she said, genuinely in awe.

Shikamaru smirked, "Yeah, everything but customers."

When she frowned sympathetically, he quickly added, "Not that it's a bad thing."

Still, she frowned at that, "O-oh, I didn't mean to disturb you when I came in. Normally, I would have waited for another time, but I'm meeting my cousin right after this--"

"No, no, that's fine," he reassured her, though he wasn't sure why he had to since he wasn't supposed to be sleeping anyway. "I like it quiet. It's nice when everywhere else in the mall is bustling and noisy." He added the finishing touches to his wrap job and swiped the girl's credit card for the purchase.

She smiled, "I prefer the quiet too, but I doubt the food court is ever peaceful. You're very lucky."

Shikamaru tore off the printed receipt and handed it to her with a pen for her signature as he unthinkingly said, "Well, if you ever want to find a peaceful moment, you know where to find it." He mentally slapped himself. How completely idiotic to invite her to hang out in his store of oddball goodies. He could see it now – having tea using china printed with border collies atop a table made from repurposed driftwood.

Despite his embarrassment at the suggestion, she beamed emphatically, "That sounds really nice. I may take you up on that offer." She signed her receipt and handed it back. "Thank you so much for your help...I'm sorry, I didn't get your name?"

"It's Shikamaru," he responded, holding out his hand to shake.

She received it happily. "I'm Hinata." She added almost shyly, "Thanks again." She picked up her large parcel, waved goodbye and left the store. Shikamaru's eyes followed her as she went up the escalator. He smirked to himself. A rich girl spending what most would spend on a car for her cousin's birthday present, of course she'd be headed up to The Cheesecake Factory. Though, she could have gone to any much higher-end place in town, but Shikamaru reasoned she stuck to the mall since she was already working there. Money _and_ common sense, a rarely found coupling, he mused.

As he chuckled to himself, still wondering why any rich teenager would willingly work, he looked at the signed receipt.

_Hyuuga Hinata._

Hyuuga, as in Fortune 500, finger in every known pie, Hyuuga Enterprises? Shikamaru gaped at the little white slip in his hand. This girl was more than rich, and smart as he was, he couldn't think of a word to properly describe the obscene wealth connected to the Hyuuga name. What in the world was she doing working at Hot Dog On A Stick?

That afternoon nap he was hoping to get back to was quickly forgotten.

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks for reading! And thank you for your reviews, they're very much appreciated!

Is it obvious how much I like Suigetsu? XD

Every mall should have a store like Shikamaru's. There was a store like that at the mall I used to work at -- no actual store name, and nothing in there made sense. It was awesome.

When I was a naive young corporate punk, I loved Hot Topic. And those salespeople always seemed too cool to work there, never really greeting customers, showing off their tattoo sleeves and obscure piercings. Now everyone and their mother goes there for 80's throwback T-shirts and emo band merch.

The Cheesecake Factory is inspired by the one sitting on top of Macy's in downtown San Francisco. I've been to a few CFs, and that one specifically is the only one where the wait staff and hosts have superiority complexes. I don't know if it's because it's on the roof of a high-end eight-story department store or what, but they're total dicks.


	4. Crap Always Happens On Saturday

At a quarter to nine on Saturday morning, Sasuke yawned as he turned his mirror-black Jaguar XK convertible into the underground employee parking garage. Unlike the previous weekday afternoons he had worked, there were plenty of spaces available. He briefly debated whether the parking convenience was worth waking up so early before the sudden change from natural morning sunlight to glaring orange fluorescents blinded him.

Walking to the elevator, he scanned the other cars as he passed. An old Jeep, an older VW Beetle, an early model sedan that looked borrowed from parents judging by the peeling "Honor Roll" bumper stickers on it. All typical, none particularly extraordinary, like their owners, he guessed. Until he came upon the Mercedes Benz E Class Coupe with an odd butterfly sticker in the corner of rear window parked next to the elevator. Was this particular model even on the market yet? And who puts stickers on elite barely-out-of-the-factory cars? Maybe a corporate owner of the mall?

It was his first opening shift as well as his first weekend shift. Juugo wanted him to experience a busy weekend but was kind enough to let him start during the slower morning. Not like he had to do much to sell anything. He had already reached and passed his sales goal for the week using Suigetsu's personalized selling tips. This retail job was a breeze, if he did say so himself.

Not bothered at all by the indignant stares, the boy cut right through the circle of morning mall-walkers doing their stretches to get to the escalator leading down to the food court. Sasuke considered leaving a note on that Mercedes demanding a door leading from the garage directly to the food court so he wouldn't have to go up an elevator then down an escalator just for a cup of coffee. He got in line with the other tired-looking mall employees in front of the coffee stand.

In front of him, two boys purchasing their breakfast brews were talking to a girl in a large grey sweatshirt with her hood pulled up.

"I'd recommend you talk to Ino at Victoria's Secret. Let her know you work at Hot Dog on a Stick," the young man with dark glasses said to the girl.

"R-really?" she responded, "She'd know how to help me?"

The other man barked out a laugh, "Oh yeah! She used to work there herself, but she'll never admit it. Tell her Kiba and Shino sent you."

As Kiba and Shino walked off with their breakfasts, Gai greeted the girl with his usual enthusiasm. "A beauteous morning brings the beautiful Hinata to my counter! How may I help you, young miss?" Now that he was able to compare, Sasuke found Gai far more annoying in the mornings.

The young woman replied in a small and sweet voice, "Just two small green teas and a large caramel latte, thank you." As Gai rang her order up, Hinata pulled items out of her sweater pockets until she reached her wallet. It was only after she paid and was stuffing her cell phone and keys back in her pocket that Sasuke noticed the Mercedes Benz key with a funny little butterfly sticker on it. Despite his incredulity, he chose to keep quiet – he didn't want to cause a big fuss when the girl realized that _Uchiha Sasuke _had been standing behind her in the coffee line the whole time.

As he distractedly placed his drink order, the Uchiha curiously watched the girl walk back to Hot Dog on a Stick with her cardboard tray of drinks, whereupon she handed a green tea to a counter-lounging Shikamaru and the latte to Shikamaru's large friend who managed the corndog eatery. Both boys tried to pay Hinata back for their beverages, but she waved them off with a smile before heading into the back room to clock in. It was only after she emerged with her midnight blue-black hair pinned into her cap and a bucket of lemons did Sasuke recognize the girl who couldn't care less who he was.

At least now he knew where to go for lunch today.

At ten o'clock on the dot, every store in the mall opened their doors for business. While arranging the heavy bags of dry dog food, Kiba looked at the calendar just behind the counter and mumbled a curse. Shino didn't look up from his book but needlessly confirmed what both knew would happen.

"First Saturday of the month. He'll be in shortly."

It wasn't long at all. As if summoned, a tall, sickly pale man with long black hair and yellowing eyes walked into the pet and supply store, smooth as a snake. He approached the counter and greeted the two employees.

"Good morning, gentlemen. How is your morning?" he asked with a wide, saccharin grin.

Ever-stoic Shino was always the one who responded, "We're doing well. And you, sir?"

Kiba, repulsed by their regular customer even after years of working at the store, automatically went to work filling the usual order for the creepy man – mice, and lots of them. Half the batch alive, the other half dead and flash frozen. As disgusting as it was to scoop dead frozen mice in a bucket, he'd pick it over making small talk with the pasty-skinned man any day. And every month he thanked whatever higher being that Shino was willing to do it.

Avoiding eye contact, Kiba quickly put the live and dead mice on the counter as Shino finished ringing up the purchase with record-breaking speed and efficiency.

"Thank you so much, gentlemen," the man said with a slight bow of his head, then looked at his bounty. "Mm, delicious," he muttered as he exited the store.

Kiba walked to the store's threshold to watch the customer leave the mall and visibly shivered in horror. "Jesus, how many snakes do you think he has if he needs that many mice?"

Shino joined his co-worker at the door and answered, "I generally try not to dwell on things that nauseate me."

Kiba grunted his agreement as his breakfast roiled uncomfortably in his stomach.

Sasuke was busy feigning productivity, rearranging the studded belt rack, when the soft-spoken assistant manager Juugo approached to inform him of his mandatory lunch break. Not needing to be told twice, he thanked him and headed out of the store. On his way out, he heard Juugo veto Suigetsu's indie thrash punk music choice, replacing it with his favorite head-banging death metal band. Sasuke concluded he would never understand how someone as docile as Juugo could listen to something so violent and heavy.

Stepping out into the throng of weekend shoppers, he cut an imposing form in the stream of people. Already aware of a group of young teenaged girls making a beeline for him from across the way, he deliberately went against the flow of traffic towards the food court. A short distance ahead, he saw his spiky-haired classmate, strolling easily against the tide of people, hands leisurely in his pockets. Barely increasing his stride, he was walking in tandem with the Nara within seconds.

"Hey."

If someone told Shikamaru that the most antisocial person on the planet was going to go out of his way to greet someone, he would not have guessed that honor would be bestowed upon himself. But he wasn't so rude as to ignore him.

"Hi. You on your lunch break?"

Sasuke gave a small nod. Shikamaru noticed his eyes darting to the right every so often in carefully controlled paranoia, then realized five or six girls were following them. He chuckled lightly, "Are you trying to get rid of them?"

Sasuke pouted his frustration. "I just want to get some fucking lunch in peace."

The pony-tailed boy observed his classmate, walking stiffly, shoulders braced as though expecting some girl of prey to pounce on him at any second. Though most guys would kill to have girls chasing after them, he could see how someone could get tired, if not completely turned off, by it. He wouldn't call what they had a friendship, but Shikamaru knew a call for help when he saw one.

"So you don't care about your reputation?" he asked.

"If I did, I'd be nice to them," Sasuke moodily answered.

Without preamble, Shikamaru smoothly took Sasuke's hand in his own and interlocked their fingers. The pony-tailed boy could feel the other's jolt of surprise, and horrified anxiety judging by how quickly the usually cool-headed Uchiha's hand got sweaty. Before Sasuke could whip his hand away, a flurry of gasps and sad wailing erupted behind him. A glance over his shoulder revealed his mall stalkers were reduced to weepy blubbering, watching Sasuke walk away hand-in-hand with his male companion. Within seconds, the girls and their cries of despair were swept away with the crowd. Shikamaru let go of Sasuke's hand as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened, putting his hand back in his pocket.

Whether it was out of gratitude or a simple desire to remain as inconspicuous as possible, Sasuke remained silent. Perhaps he was feeling appreciation for the sacrifice another man was willing to make for someone he hardly knew and could barely call an acquaintance, let alone a friend. Some newly-forged, unspoken bond formed between the two young men, a connection that could not be ignored after the performance of a truly selfless act. At the very least, the perpetually aloof Uchiha found someone with whom he could tolerate sitting through his lunch break.

As for Shikamaru, he was just glad the guy didn't clock him.

"She's on her lunch," Chouji smilingly informed his customer, who had already been served not twenty minutes earlier and was now ordering a dozen lemonades.

The boy, embarrassed to have been called out, blushed furiously and quickly walked away. The customer behind him, though, had no qualms. "When will she be back?"

The assistant manager sighed, "Forty-five minutes or so." Really, these people were shameless. But business was business, and if it took a cute girl bouncing on lemons to compete with the other food court dining options, then capitalism thrived on delicious fresh-squeezed lemonade. The majority of the line dispersed, leaving mostly tired moms succumbing to their kids' demands for corndogs and mall employees who wanted a cheap lunch.

Or a free lunch, like his next customer.

"Oi, Shikamaru, corndog and fries?" Chouji greeted his best friend.

The addressed ran a hand over his ponytail. "As usual." He turned around, and it was only then that Chouji noticed he brought someone else along. "You want anything, Sasuke?" Shikamaru asked.

Sasuke, somewhat taken aback, politely declined, "No, thanks, I can get my own lunch–"

But the ever-friendly assistant manager wouldn't have it. "Don't worry about it! A friend of Shikamaru's is a friend of mine!"

The poor boy looked absolutely puzzled at the notion, but accepted, "Sure, corndog and lemonade, please." Chouji handed them a tray of food without ringing them up, then went back to the comparative handful of customers waiting to be served. Shikamaru sat on the counter, toward the end where he'd be out of the way of transactions but still within communicative distance of Chouji. He wordlessly invited Sasuke to join him, but the other declined, choosing to lean on the counter instead.

"So," Shikamaru began while biting into his corndog, "What's up with Hinata?" Sasuke's attention was piqued, but he retained his indifferent expression.

Chouji, continuing to help customers, laughed, "Oh, not you too. She's got enough of a fan congregation already!"

Shikamaru quickly looked away and cleared his throat uncomfortably, "Uh no, I mean, what's she doing working in a mall?"

With no line of customers remaining, Chouji was free to entertain his lunching friend. "She's like us, just working through her summer vacation," he shrugged off.

Silent up till now, Sasuke gulped his lemonade and uttered, "Bullshit." The other two looked at him questioningly, so he explained, "She has a pre-market Benz parked in the garage." If she drove a car like that, one would think her whole life was a summer vacation, but that went unsaid.

Shikamaru smirked, "Well, then I think it's confirmed."

Chouji frowned, "What's confirmed?"

"She really is a Hyuuga," Shikamaru explained. "She bought a gift for her cousin at my store on her first day and I saw her name on the receipt."

The assistant manager pretended to be distracted by wiping down the counter and merely grunted a neutral response. Years of friendship told Shikamaru that Chouji knew more. "Just tell us," the boy drawled. "It's not like some corporate spy conspiracy. She's just hawking corndogs for minimum wage. I doubt Hyuuga Enterprises is planning a hostile corndog takeover and monopolization."

The larger man sighed, knowing it was futile to hide anything from the nosy Nara, "She's the daughter of the President and CEO of Hyuuga Enterprises. She's going into her second year studying business and political science. She has no prior work experience whatsoever and was entirely home-schooled before college. She just wants to anonymously get a sense of the real world to better prepare herself for running the family business. Alright?" he recited in a single breath.

Shikamaru blinked. She was not just _any_ Hyuuga. She was the _daughter_ of Hyuuga Hiashi. The sweet, soft-spoken and polite girl who bought a birthday present for her cousin was the offspring of one of the wealthiest men in the country, if not the world. For someone so outrageously rich, Hinata was remarkably friendly. Especially for someone so excessively sheltered. He would have expected an attitude like Sasuke's, but that was digressing. Speaking of which, Sasuke had suddenly stood up straighter and unconsciously ran his hand through his hair. Following the broody young man's eyes, Shikamaru noted that Hinata was approaching the corndog stand hauling a large Victoria's Secret bag, followed by a blond boy dressed all in black carrying two Cheesecake Factory doggie bags. They were still at least shouting distance from Hot Dog on a Stick, which was the only explanation why the blond would greet in that manner.

"CHOUJI! I got your girl and your lunch– HEY BASTARD ARE YOU ON YOUR BREAK?"

Hinata gasped in alarm, but didn't scold her boisterous companion since it looked like neither Shikamaru nor his black-clad friend did anything to acknowledge the young man's insult.

Instead, she saw that the nameless friend stood up from his counter-leaning when the two newcomers reached them and responded with a cool though not entirely unfriendly, "What's up, Dumbass?"

Hinata swiftly though not ungently nicked the doggie bags from her friend before he could toss them onto the counter from where he stood and risk spillage. "Chouji, I picked up lunch for you while I was getting mine – I hope you like your steak medium-rare..." but that was all she managed to get out since her supervisor had already torn into the bag as soon as he heard "steak." Sasuke and Shikamaru looked at their own lunches in disappointment.

"Aw, thanks, Hinata! You really didn't have to go to the trouble," he said, though he looked thoroughly appreciative that she did.

"Oh no, don't thank me. It's really from Naruto," she motioned toward her companion, who brushed off her gratitude.

"You should actually thank Itachi," he replied. "He was the one who told me to comp your lunches."

Sasuke, who had been content standing at the counter with his corndog, for the most part ignored, perked up at the mention of his older brother and his unusual generosity. Naruto could have spotted his old friend's subtle reaction a mile away and answered the Uchiha's unsaid question, "_Yes_, your brother actually pulled the stick out of his ass long enough to be nice to someone."

It was only at that moment that Hinata realized her social faux pas. Though to be fair, it was Naruto's duty to make introductions, but she understood that such formalities weren't very common outside her years of finishing school courses and etiquette training. Embarrassed that she didn't remember to introduce herself to the stranger, she took the opportunity to include the dark-haired boy in the conversation. "I'm s-sorry, I should have greeted you earlier. I'm Hinata," she said with a shy tilt of the lips and her small hand positioned for a handshake.

For a brief moment, it looked as if the boy was actually wary of her offered hand, but good manners won out and he brushed the crumbs off his hands before gingerly accepting hers. "Sasuke," he introduced himself flatly and rather stone-faced.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," the girl replied automatically, followed by a quick three-pump shake of hands as she had been properly taught. Hinata could hear Naruto snickering behind her and ignored Sasuke's glare over her shoulder. She wouldn't question the strange animosity of their apparent friendship. Either way, he was announcing his departure.

"Alright, I'm outta here. My shift starts in a few minutes." The blond young man clapped his friend roughly on the back and laughed, "And be a good boy, Sasuke. Not all girls want to jump your jock." He jumped out of the way before the Uchiha could react and sprinted for the escalator with a jovial wave and yelled goodbye.

_Oh my, I guess the rumors are true,_ Hinata thought to herself.

While shopping for an extra supportive bra at Victoria's Secret, a pink-haired girl practically threw herself into the store and wailed at her salesperson, Ino, that the word around the Claire's/Limited Too junction was that their shared crush was not only decidedly spoken for, but that the significant other was most definitely male. A pony-tailed male, as the rumor mill had pegged him. In the middle of showing Hinata the remarkable tensile strength of a turquoise bra's band, Ino knocked over a pile of thongs off a table in her explosive denial that their precious Sasuke could be gay. At that point, Hinata quickly nipped the bra out of Ino's hand, paid for her new back-saving garment, and skittered out of the store before something else could happen. She never expected to be introduced to that very same Sasuke not five minutes later, nor did she expect that the sleepy-eyed boy she met in the gift shop was Sasuke's boyfriend.

Suddenly, Shikamaru's standing offer of a quiet place to take a break seemed much less nerve-wracking. She wondered when she would be able to take advantage of the invitation as she headed to the back room to change into her new bra in anticipation of some heavy-duty lemon-squashing.

**Author's Note:**

...Hi. It's been awhile, eh?**  
**


End file.
